I am an ardent lover of cake. I worship under its delicious alter and bow my head to it’s buttercream frosting. I don’t just love any cake. There are criteria that needs to be met. For non creamy cakes, nothing can beat good old McRennet’s tea cake with no walnuts. Soft, fluffy and perfectly appropriate to finish the whole box in a sitting, something I have done on multiple occasions.

Cream cakes can be decadent but can also be fake news. The fake news cream cake tricks you into believing that under that disgusting amount of cream lies a cake. False. Lies. Underneath all that frosting plus whipped cream (yuck) is the tiniest evidence that once upon a time there might have been cake there. This is the spawn of the devil.

Perfect cream cakes are the ones that have a sensible ratio of frosting to cake. My dream ratio is 1:4. Just the right amount of frosting to add to the sweetness without leaving you to die in a sugar coma. 

Last year I was on a quest to find my son the most perfect first birthday cake that looked good and met all my requirements. I was not prepared to shell out money to purchase a fondant cake that looked like a cartoon character or an animal or whatever it is that kids want their cakes to look like. Imagine biting into a beautiful looking fondant cake only to find that the insides taste like cardboard. Nightmare.

I wanted a proper birthday cake that tasted spectacular. The stars aligned and I found my dream bakery that makes my dream cake. For Reyhan’s first birthday I ordered a beautiful chocolate cake with raspberry filling and buttercream frosting. I was looking forward to Reyhan’s second birthday which much anticipation because milestones, baby growing, yadda, yadda, but also because I ordered a banana cake with cream cheese frosting. And it was the best darn cake I’ve ever put in my mouth. I cannot even begin to describe the moist, banana cake generously surrounded with cream cheese. It sounds like a strange combination but it was sublime.

I ate leftover cake for breakfast four days in a row. Tomorrow though, I will have to eat an egg and be satisfied with my life’s choices.