Posted on by Zarine Mohideen

Day 9 – Late

I know, I’m like so many days late for this blogathon. I should have ben more prepared! Scheduled posts or something but this past week, time was not on my side. I was either doing something or was too exhausted to even lift a finger. So now I’m way behind on this blogathon and I need to catch up!

I don’t have access to my computer that has pictures on it so I can’t do a picture post. I can’t think of anything thought provoking or fascinating to write about so I can’t do that either. Instead I’m going to type away on this computer.

So whats up Interwebz? How you been?

I’ve been good. University is pretty amazing. I love every bit of it, even the bits I don’t understand. Knowledge really is a wonderful thing. It makes you act differently, more responsibly, and I love that. I love listening about new things, new ideas, concepts that I’ve seen with my eyes but haven’t comprehended until now. I may be a walking, talking cliche but I love how interesting this week was.

Throughout school and college my mother would be the person to whom I would talk about my day to. I would give her the minute details of my day – what I ate, what my friends wore, what that other girl said, everything. It’s a habit that won’t wear off. Now I’ve replaced my mother with Jay and I force him to listen to what I say. Its lovely, just lovely.

I just ate a poppy seed bagel with granola peanut butter spread. I hope I don’t have bits of it when I smile at people.

Have a great day, people reading this!

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen

Day 8 – Howl

“If you could only see the beast you’ve made of me

I held it in but now it seems you’ve set it running free

Screaming in the dark, I howl when we’re apart

Drag my teeth across your chest to taste your beating heart”

I might have been living under a rock for so long ’cause I’ve only recently discovered Florence + The Machine. I love how amazing she is. She might be high most of the time but I love how wild, crazy and so full of energy she is. And her clothes and flaming red hair, I WANT.

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen · 6 Comments

Day 7 – Stalkers

I had my orientation yesterday. Three hours of talking and getting to know others and another hour of a lecture on campus safety. I couldn’t help but subconsciously make comparisons to my orientation in undergrad which consisted of various heads talking about how great a college we were in, the number of laurels the college has won and why we were lucky to study there.I do not recollect a single word being spoken on how we should protect ourselves and be safe within the campus. This month is Stalker Awareness month at SCU and they gave out leaflets defining harassment and stalkers. They gave help line numbers and introduced us to the student safety organizations.

The flyer defined a stalker as someone who repeatedly approaches you even though you have denied their advances. And instantly my mind flashed to my first year of college where guys would keep calling/texting girls and intimidate them in the name of ‘ragging’. While ragging might actually be a good thing if done in good spirit, the other kind almost bordered harassment. The weird thing about this is I never realized that it was harassment until today.

Creeps would get the phone number of girls and send them anonymous text messages, blank calls, anonymous calls, etc in the hope of either starting a relationship or if that doesn’t work out, a friendship. This has happened to me and to every other friend of mine. We would brush of this kind of menace and not take it too seriously. I have an inbuilt ignoring system where once I feel uncomfortable with someone I just ignore them. This did work for me a few times but there were instances when ignoring them would send a ‘playing hard to get’ vibe.

Why did it take me so long to realize that this was harassment? And why did me and my friends never do anything about it? I thought ok, that was a phase, everyone is weird in college and they’d be done with it but no. This vacation when I was in Madras I met one of my girls who works in a top IT company. She was talking about the same kind of guys. There was a guy who would look up the bus time table and make sure he comes with her everyday even though she kept her distance, he would message her on the company’s messaging system and she would be cryptic. Then, he started calling her and texting her repeatedly although she never picked up or replied to his messages.

I’m really baffled as to why we (me included) take this kind of harassment lightly. In college I knew some girls who were flattered by this kind of attention! Guys really need to learn that there is a fine line between showing interest and harassment.

Colleges should also start some sort of student safety organisation. I always felt that my college/university made things difficult instead of easy for us. Maybe they’d change once the stop treating us like children.

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen · 4 Comments

Day 5

The sudden stop of the plane jolted her awake. She craned her neck to look out the plane window, past the man with the greasy hair. It was still early. She could see the golden rays of the sun inching slowly through the clouds. Clouds – fluffy – white- vanilla – ice cream – Ian’s – Asl— her mind immediately made the connection. She shook her head hoping that it would empty itself of the memories.

It was half an hour before she could collect her bags. The descent from the aircraft had been uneventful. After being away for so long she expected small things to give her that spark of excitement, but no. She saw a girl who had the word fear tattooed across her arm in Italian.

“Exactly what I needed”, she whispered under her breath.

Finally, she saw the polka dotted ribbon of her suitcase. She collected her things and pushed the trolley towards the exit. The butterflies were going crazy in her stomach, a mixture of excitement and fear, of the unknown.

“Just remember its not going to be the same, Hana. Remember you can change everything about you.”

With this chorus in her heart and a prayer on her mouth she stepped out on to the busy streets of New York. It was a mixture of people and taxi cabs. Everyone was heading somewhere. Everyone had a purpose. But she was stuck to the pavement. There it was, bang opposite the airport exit – Ian’s Ice Cream Parlor written in a cheery red color. The moment she saw that, all the memories came flooding back and it took all the strength she had to move forward.

“I can make it through one day without thinking about him.” T

his was just one of the many lies she told herself to get through the day.

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen

Day 3 – Energy

I have finally realized the importance of surrounding oneself with positive energy. Every person radiates some sort of energy. I have found that being amongst happy, good spirited and humorous people does wonders for my state of mind. Weird as it may be, I find myself kind of absorbing and reflecting off the energy they give out.

I know how it is to live in the darkest recesses of the mind. A negative state of mind is even worse than being surrounded by negative people. It is the hardest thing, pulling yourself out from a sinking hold. It takes time, prayer and a lot of hope.

The greatest thing you can do to have a positive mind is to stay away from people who spew poison and negativity, the ones whose biggest dream is your downfall. If you can’t stay away from these people then the next best thing to do is to forget everything they say the moment the sound waves hit your ear.

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Day 2 – Books

The list of the books I’ve reading 2013 is very embarrassing. I used to find so much comfort in reading. But technology has now ruined that for me. I finally managed to get my hands on A Suitable Boy by Vikram Seth. It took me forever to get through it, but what a read that was! Honor by Elif Shafak was another tear-jerker. It may sound creepy but I LOVE sad books, the ones that really pierce my heart. I feel so much for the characters and if I shed a tear at the end you know it’s a good book.I’ve always wanted to read Franny and Zooney ’cause it was her favorite book. I finally read it and now I know why. I know for sure I will be rereading it soon.

I finally gave non fiction books a chance. Women From the Ankle Down by Rachelle Bergstein and Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg were the two books I tried. Both were informative in their own way. The first book especially, cause it had a lot about Salvatore Ferragamo and the Varina flats is something I’d like to own.

I also managed to finish reading Lemony Snicket’s Series of Unfortunate Events series. Daniel Handler is my new favorite children’s book author. The man really know how to write. I’m super excited for his new books although Who Could That be at This Hour didn’t hit the spot.

For 2014 I have a huge list of books to be read, a few half read books to finish and a longer list of books I want to revisit. I want to tear myself away from thinking that reading The New Yorker and Cosmo can substitute for reading books.

Note to self : just because you get a free copy of Cosmo Latina in the mail DOES NOT mean you have to read it.

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen · 14 Comments

1/1/2014

Happy new year, Interwebz!

If I had to recap 2013 I would say that it has really been a year of ups and downs. I went through some extreme lows questioning everything about me. But I managed to find the strength to pull myself out of the quick sand.

This year I intend to leave no room for self doubt. I finally have a purpose and something to keep my mind at work. I’m so excited to dive head-on in to it and find myself again. I’ve lost sight of myself for the longest time and I really want to work at finding ‘me’ again. I just read the previous sentence and realized how cliched it sounds but really, that’s what I want to do!

This year will be the year of Zarine, the year in which I will experience new things.

To a fabulous 2014!

 

Posted on by Zarine Mohideen · 4 Comments

To a Love Like No Other

One perfect misty evening two girls took turns on a swing. They were best friends, soul sisters and lovers like no other. Fate brought them together. They stuck with each other through many bumps and finally made it to what they then thought was the cusp of their life. That balmy evening they talked about their dreams, hopes and fears. They were starting a new chapter in their life, taking different paths to reach one final destination.

But what did those two eighteen year olds know then about the places life would take them, about the twists that would come, the successes and the heartbreaks. Life was a rollercoaster. They went through all the twists intended for them, clutching on to each other for dear life.

From that day onwards every December 31st the girls reminisce that day. They discuss their achievements and fears, and start the new year leaning on each other. Because the space on the swing has already been reserved, it doesn’t matter if we bring in the year in style or by ordering in pizza, we’ll never start the year without each other. ‘Cause this kind of love is a once in lifetime kind of love. Its a love like no other.

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