Today I was asked to be someones wing-man.
Or wing-woman, technically.
Major ‘How I Met Your Mother/Barney Stinson’ nightmares!
:O
Madras
Happy birthday Madras… the city of my birth, the love of my life.
Image courtesy: Google Images
"B-uty" Contest
In 1994, when Aishwarya Rai and Sushmita Sen won the Miss.World and Miss.Universe titles respectively, I was but a gullible 5 year old. The day Aishwarya won the crown I was glued to the TV. She looked so pretty all decked up and wearing that gorgeous gown and tiara! Unfortunately, wearing a tiara was one of my life’s ambitions! I was of an impressionable age!
Ever since that day, for quite a long period of time I must confess, I draped my mother’s dupattas and wore headbands as tiaras and believed that one day I would be Miss.Universe too.
Sad, I know!
But such was my life.
I remember the contests being beautiful, ethereal and almost fairy tale like. Recently I read an article stating that the Miss.Universe Organization headed by Donald Trump has decided to have a lingerie photo shoot of all the contestants. The prominent display of skin show topless-ness besmirches the name of such a competition. I’d just like to make clear that I, in no way support beauty pageants such as these, but the introduction of skin show and the flaunting of bikini clad bodies take away what remains at the very essence of these competitions.
Why is it necessary to have a ‘best body’ competition for a Miss.Universe/World pageant when the actual duties of the winner is not in the least related to it? Instead of promoting a good body image and self confidence inducing theme for young girls, they show a bunch of giggly model types wearing barely nothings and the all important country sash jumping up and down and behaving bimbo-tic.
The ‘beauty with brains’ is such a pathetic excuse. Most contestants answer the questions in such an incomprehensible way as seen in this video.
While going through my regular news website I saw that Miss.Universe 2010 had started and the National Costume competition was taking place. Here is a select few costumes that are absolutely horrendous!
KOSOVO:
I never knew there was a country called Kosovo and who would want to wear a gold cow/goat on their head!??
MAURITIUS:
The most colorful shower curtain…. err.. dress.
THAILAND:
I like the traditional dress but is she wearing boots, is she wearing socks or both? It plays with your mind!
TURKEY:
We regret to inform you that Miss.Turkey has been replaced by Cousin It from the Addams Family.
VENEZUELA:
Miss.Venezuela, Lady Gaga called. She wants her clothes back.
ALBANIA:
Miss.Albania is proud to channels a Las Vegas show girl.
INDIA:
The originality baffles me. Note how the costume looks uncannily like Blair’s dress in Season 2 :
COLOMBIA:
This is the national dress of my country too. Except we call it komanam.
“I recalled this tattered memory from when I was a ten-year-old miniaturist’s apprentice like a picture whose outlines are clear but whose colors have faded”
Chapter 28-
I Will Be Called A Murderer
My Name Is Red
Orhan Pamuk
Words would land on me,
Then abandon me,
Mangle untangle me,
Leave me on the floor.
Rhymes they sprang in me,
Summer sang in me,
But summer sings in me no more.
What I learnt Today
Of all the things God has given us, the gift of speech is what separates us from animals. The existence of people from various nationalities speaking in various dialects, many not know to man, is one of the signs that tell us God does exist.
This gift of speech is not enjoyed by everyone. There are people, young and old who live everyday without uttering even a single syllable. We, the lucky few, who ought to say wonderful things from the mouths and tongues that God gave us end up swearing, cursing and speak in the foulest of languages. Words, we think carry no meaning and disappear once they are thrown in air but nothing lingers longer than words.
There are times when saying nothing means so much more than all the words in the Dictionary combined. There are silences, so awkward that nothing can be said to cover them. At times, the heart yearns for words left unspoken, for words not heard often. There are words that pierce like a dagger to the heart. Silence calms the heart so much more.
When things are best left unsaid, when there is nothing more left to say or when the awkwardness exceeds its capacity the only thing that can be said, the only thing that should be said is, “As salamu alaikum”.
This can overcome any sort of uneasiness, awkwardness or nervousness. The barakth of saying this first will push your chances of entering jannah a step higher. And it will automatically make you the bigger person.
This is what life taught me today.
An Itch And A Scratch
If I were to go to hell for one thing, and one thing alone it would be for murder.
Murder of hundreds upon thousands of mosquitoes whose bite marks have scarred my hands and feet beyond repair.
I don’t know if it is my “sweet” blood or my penetrable skin, but I attract mosquitoes like bees to honey. Mosquitoes have given me sleepless nights. I’ve spent hours killing every single mosquito in the room with my bare hands.
Gross, I know.
Even a single mosquito at night can keep awake till day break. My feet bear the scars of battles lost against mosquitoes. I’ve had a mosquito bite me on my hands, feet, fore head, eyebrow!, lip, tip of my nose, on my little toe, my back and even on my ear. Those suckers come, juicy and fat, loaded with blood and insert their sharp proboscis into my already deformed skin. The worst part is they are so tiny yet, they inflict pain like nothing else! My mortal enemy, after dogs of course, are mosquitoes. I waged war against them since the day I was born.
I have, at one point of time, inhaled a mosquito! Like really, actually breathed in a live mosquito like it was the most natural thing on Earth. But thankfully I also sneezed it out and it did come out… dead.
I know God made everything for a reason and we shouldn’t question him. But can someone please explain to me what purpose does the mosquito actually solve apart from showing its vampire-is-tic tendencies?
When I was little, I used to get the most awful mosquito bites. Red, sore, pus infused, disgusting scabs all over my limbs. I used to practically cry myself to sleep every night. I have used every mosquito repellent available in the market from Odomos to Good Night gel, Tortoise kosu bathhi, All Out liquid and I have even slept under mosquito nets. Till date, nothing has worked. I have a story for almost every prominent mosquito bite on my body. I have scratched my sores so much so that I’ve had skin peel off.
And the only reason I’m up this late telling you this is because the darn mosquitoes won’t let me sleep! As of tonight alone I would have killed close to twenty mosquitoes. That is not something I’m proud of but it does give me some sadistic pleasure.
I am SO going to Hell.
ohmygod
I saw Inception today. I will not review it nor will I give away anything about the story here. No one should ruin your experience of watching it for the first time. I cannot stop thinking about it.
Please watch Inception.
Please.
For me atleast.
But I will say this –
1. Dicaprio may be old but he still has not lost his awesome-ness.
2. Joseph Gordon Levitt, I have been watching you since your ‘Third Rock from The Sun’ days. You have grown to become this wonderfully, for the lack of a better word, smokin’ person who fills out a suit nicely.
3. Nolan, I love you.
We dream of what could have been. The concept of if is very endearing, increasing anticipation. It is so close, yet, miles away from finding its way into reality.
We build castles in the air without realizing that we have no control over it. We dream without realizing that Allah has plans for us. Plans that can destroy or refurnish the very core of our being.
We are, but human.
Mortals, who believe that everything is possible, that science and technology have no borders and can build towers from debris.
We believe in many things.
But we should also believe that everything happens for a reason.
This has got to be the single most dull, boring and depressing vacation ever.
More than one month of holidays and I have done nothing worth mentioning.
Except, well, watching all the seasons of Entourage.
I cannot decide whom I like better, Vince or E.
I will spend the remainder of my holidays figuring that out.
Maybe In Madras 