The traffic in Chennai is getting worse everyday. The past couple of days it took me an hour and a half to come from Mount Road/Anna Salai to Anna Nagar. The number of cars have increased multi-fold. This isn’t anything new, but NO ONE OBSERVES THE TRAFFIC RULES! In bumper to bumper traffic today at Nungambakkam High Road the foolish person behind the wheel on the left most side of the road turned on his right indicator and took a deep turn! People honestly need to know where they want to go!

I use the brake more than the accelerator. I think my speedometer showed like 20km/Ph or so. Anyways, while I was stuck in this signal, there stood next to me the ever threatening MTC bus. If there is one thing I’m scared of while driving its the MTC buses. They are the Rajas of the road. I respect them a lot ’cause no way do I want to die in front of one.

So ya, in the aforementioned bus which was spilling with people there stood a row of pakka rowdy type boys behind some pavum girls. Theses guys were singing and playing beats on the roof of the bus and basically making a public menace of themselves.

That’s when I saw the look on the girls’ faces. FEAR with a capital F.

The guys were standing SO close to the girls. I felt extremely sad that these girls were not able to afford any other kind of transportation and had to undergo this kind of unruly behavior. Women are always targeted. You can wave your women’s lib bras saying we’re equal to menfolk but it is stupid to ignore the obvious fact staring right at you.

How many times have you been felt up in a crowd or have been on the receiving side of lewd glares? You may be the bravest most smartest woman around but once you’ve had a bad experience where you’ve been molested or harassed then your perception on life changes in an instant. I don’t mean to say that women have to shut themselves at home and never set foot outside. I am totally for the independence of women financially or otherwise.

But we need to be aware of what lines not to cross. I’ve seen girls literally throw themselves at guys and make such fools of themselves. There a girls whose first aim while entering a room is to scrounge for good looking guys and make sure that they catch the their attention. They flip their hair, flatter their eyelashes and talk decibels louder just so that everyone knows that she is in the room. There are some people who naturally exude confidence and grace and they attract a different set of eyes but there are a select few who specialize in grabbing eyeballs.

Islam commands women to cover their modesty or hyyah. We are taught how to act and behave in public places. Basically we are taught not to make fools of ourselves. But this, as all things are, is not practiced by every Muslim. In fact Muslim girls are the ones who practice a high degree of immodesty.

Being modest does not mean immediately wearing a burkha, a niqab, covering the face and being anti-social. Modesty is knowing your limits and protecting your hyyah.

There are girls who, Astagfirullah, wear their hijabs in the most provocative way. There are also girls who do not wear hijab but dress so modestly.

It’s easy to say “I can do whatever I want but men have to learn to keep their hands off me “. But girlfriend, once you have a bad experience all that goes right out the window.

Basically it’s just like your Mamma told you – Better safe than sorry.

It doesn’t FEEL like a new year. Few years ago new year was a HUUGE thing. My family and I we used to go out for dinner every year. People used to go crazy on the roads and everybody would be all “HAPPY NEW YEAR! WOOOHOOO!!!”.

Ya, that doesn’t happen anymore.

When I look back at 2010 I’m mad at myself for having done nothing substantial. I feel like going back in time and doing everything better than the last time. Three hundred and sixty five (sixty six if it was a leap year) days seem to have gone by so fast. The past year did give me a few life changing experiences. I did make a some life altering decisions and for that I’m happy.

I know it’s not wise to look back and wonder why I wasted time. This year, God willing, will be much different. I will take each day as it comes and make optimum use of it.

I do not have resolutions per se but just certain goals that need to be accomplished. And oh, I also want to be a better person ’cause the last year yeah, not so much improvement in that department.

Also, I will blog regularly. I’m such an embarrassment to myself. I’ve had this blog for three years and I’ve just had over a hundred posts. That is how committed I am. How depressing!

But yes, this year all that will change Insha Allah.

Starting with loosing all the oodels of weight I’ve gained eating pasta and Toblerone.

Starting now.
Right after I finish this piece of Toblerone.

We dream of what could have been. The concept of if is very endearing, increasing anticipation. It is so close, yet, miles away from finding its way into reality.

We build castles in the air without realizing that we have no control over it. We dream without realizing that Allah has plans for us. Plans that can destroy or refurnish the very core of our being.

We are, but human.
Mortals, who believe that everything is possible, that science and technology have no borders and can build towers from debris.

We believe in many things.
But we should also believe that everything happens for a reason.

Throughout my life I have come across many people who are extremely focused and who know what they want to do in life. Some people have always dreamed of going to Med school and somehow through either merit or money they made it. Others scored great percentile and got into National Universities or colleges. Most of them had at least some kind of vision as to what they wanted to be. When my friends were thinking about the future I lived in my own fantasy world taking each day as it came, not making any plans, not knowing where I was going to end up. I had my head up in the clouds, reading, dreaming and enjoying every moment.

When the time came to scout for colleges it was assumed that I would do Engineering. In Crescent. And I did not hesitate for even a micro-second. At that point in my life I did not know what I was good at. I did not have any vision of what I wanted to do. I just stood around while preparations were made for me to join Crescent. And since my family had something like a legacy there I was excited.

Now, three years into my degree education and there is not a single day where I don’t regret making the choices that I did. For two years I sat in Engineering lectures physically present but mentally absent, as my teachers used to say. It took me a long, long time to accept my fate and come back to reality. Finally I realized that thinking about this won’t help. I decided to accept my fate but still work towards a better future. The only good thing that happened to me through all these years is that I finally found out what I was remotely good at and what I wanted to do in life.

So if there are any students who have given their Boards this year and reading this then this is for you.

Please have a concrete idea of what you want to do in life. It doesn’t matter if its Medicine, Commerce or Engineering. Know what you want to do. And do not let your parents or your peers influence you. It is hard to take a stand against parents who force you into joining something you don’t like or don’t have an aptitude for. But you have to. This is your life. If you don’t care for it, who will? Studying something you hate is a waste of time and extremely depressing. Please do not mess up your life.

The “Three Idiots” anthem still sounds over India. Every parent wants their kid to be successful and everything. But if you really want to do something different you have to stand up for yourself. If this doesn’t happen, India will still be producing technically poor Engineers and Doctors without merit.

The power to change your destiny lies in your hands. All of us can accept our fate as it comes, but it takes courage to stand up and change it.

Is it fair to punish an entire group of students for the faults, or rather, the stupidity of another? This girl in my college killed herself a few weeks back and now we, the surviving are bearing the brunt of her mindless actions.

I have no respect or pity for a girl who was crazy enough to take her own life for an even crazier reason. And now the management goes around putting these fancy, idiotic rules and expects us to follow them! Its amazing how their stupidity gets ahead of them.

I would honestly feel for the girl if she had a psychological problem or something. None of us got to choose whether we wanted to be born or not. Allah gave us the gift of life and we are expected to shut up and live it the best we can and thank him for giving us life everyday to accomplish our goals and to set new ones. Everybody goes through a rough patch. Life is not all happy and good. At times it shits you in the face. But you rub it off and still at least try to live each day the best you can. We have no right to take our life when we want to. Allah gave it to us and He will take it back when He wants to. Till then we gotta shut up and live.

If only she knew the consequences of her actions.

I guess her stupidity did get the better of her. For good.